It's quite incredible that a movie as short as 90 minutes could be so dull and ineffective. But alas, 'Desierto, directed by Jonás Cuarón, does just that. The movie is extremely simplistic to the point where the audience never really knows why any of the events in the movie even happen. There is no discussion of motivation almost all of the characters, and the plot is simply just one long game of cat and mouse with absolutely no twists or surprises along the way.
The mice, in this case, are some of the most uninteresting characters that I have ever had the misfortune of seeing. There was only one moment in the movie which I thought was genuinely an interesting character moment. Perhaps if the cast was larger, and plot more complex, this would not have been such an issue, but unfortunately we have the opposite - the plot literally could not be more basic, and for most of the movie there are only three characters. But these characters are completely unable to carry the movie or make it faintly watchable as they are, simply put, horrendously uninteresting and unimaginative. There is a raccoon who appears for around three seconds in the movie that I swear was more interesting and potent than anyone else in the movie.
The performances, just to add to the shameful mess that is this movie, are fairly poor, save Jeffrey Dean Morgan as the unmotivated, psychotic murderer that randomly comes across a group of survivors and decides to start killing them. So basically his character in The Walking Dead. But even Jeffrey Dean Morgan, with his reliable charm and strong performance, cannot save this one.
There are a few moments of genuine tension, which did have me guessing what would happen next, but that is the only other positive I can squeeze out of this one. This movie is like Catch Me If You Can, but instead of a great story and thoroughly enjoyable characters and performances, you are fed the most repetitive, dull and forgettable excuse for a story and characters that is this movie. Even though 90 minutes may not seem long for a movie, trust me, this will feel like a lifetime.
4/10
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